It’s been a hectic Sunday. Christmas is coming. The house needs rearranging. Laundry is backed up. I start work tomorrow. AAAAGGHH! I go to work tomorrow. So needless, to say my belly is full of FIRST DAY jitters.
I will fairly admit that I’ve been a little on edge tonight.
So, we check backpacks, lay out clothes, figure out lunches, and talk about what time Mommy is leaving and when Grandmom is coming to put them on the bus. I take them upstairs and tuck them into bed. As I’m putting some last minute socks on Ems feet (which she will surely kick off and at the end of the week I will find six pairs partying at the bottom of the bed), I casually say,
“Im sorry I’ve been irritable, I’m a little nervous about tomorrow”
To which she replies, “Why?”
“Well, I wonder if I will do good and if I can learn everything and if the people there will like me.”
“You’ll be fine”.
“It’s a little like the first day of school.”
“Don’t worry Mommy, they’ll like you. I was really nervous for Boo on her first day of school”.
“Thank you Em’s. I just hope I can do okay with working and keeping the house and taking good care of you and Boo.”
“You did it before”.
“Yeah, well, your Daddy was around then.”
“Well, you took care of everything.”
Have I told anyone lately how brilliant this girl is. How keen she is. How aware she is. How sensitive to other peoples feeling she is. It was all I could do not to cry. Here was my seven year old girl, reassuring me that I was going to be okay. So I sat on her bed, yanked her out of her covers and hugged her so very tight.
“What’s that for?”, she said.
“Because I love you so much and you just made me feel so much better, telling me it would go okay.”
She smirked and cuddled back into the covers.
“Do you want me to leave your light on?”
Moment passes. She will never remember.
I on the other hand will hold it in my heart forever.