Day of Divorce

Today I step into the courtroom and my eleven-year marriage comes to an end.  I do not feel sad, so do not worry about me, the blessing of a fourteen-month separation is that by the time the divorce happens, your heart is on the mend.  Therefore, I continue on with this new chapter I find myself writing.

Letting Go

author unknown.

To let go doesn’t mean to stop caring;
It means I can’t do it for someone else.
To let go is not to cut myself off…
It’s the realization that I can’t control another…
To let go is not to enable,
but to allow learning from natural consequences.
To let go is to admit powerlessness,
which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To let go is not to try and change or blame another,
I can only change myself.
To let go is not to care for, but to care about.
To let go is not to fix, but to be supportive.
To let go is not to judge,
but to allow another to be a human being.
To let go is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes,
but to allow others to affect their own outcomes.
To let go is not to be protective,
it is to permit another to face reality.
To let go is not to deny, but to accept.IMG_1585 To let go is not to nag, scold, or argue,
but to search out my own shortcomings and correct them. To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires,
but to take each day as it comes and cherish the moment.
To let go is not to criticize and regulate anyone, but to try to become what I dream I can be.
To let go is not to regret the past,
but to grow and live for the future.
To let go is to fear less and love more.

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9 Comments

Filed under single parenthood

9 responses to “Day of Divorce

  1. wishing you continuing strength x

  2. Wow…what an amazing poem. So many of the lines rang true for me, too… I am glad that you are on the mend. xo

    ps…cute picture!

  3. thinking of you today

  4. Sending warm thoughts your way.

  5. Hugs to you strong mama!!

  6. Wishing you love, peace and strength. Sending thoughts your way…

  7. Came upon this today and immediately thought of you…

    “Every one of us is called upon, probably many times, to start a new life. A frightening diagnosis, a marriage, a move, loss of a job…And onward full tilt we go, pitched and wrecked and absurdly resolute, driven in spite of everything to make good on a new shore. To be hopeful, to embrace one possibility after another – that is surely the basic instinct…Crying out: High tide! Time to move out into the glorious debris. Time to take this life for what it is.”

    ~Barbara Kingsolver, from “High Tide in Tuscon”

  8. i e-mailed this post to my mom who went through a very similar type of marriage awhile back. she said she loved what you had written and it made her cry. there is such truth in these words. i am glad you had time to come to terms with everything, and that you and the girls are so happy together 🙂

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