A few weeks ago Boo walked up to me and gave me a huge hug. She said to me then, “I just helped fill your bucket”.
No idea. Then she explained a concept she learned at school. Some days I am about ready to pull my hair out with complaints about school, but this time they redeemed themselves.
Your bucket is what brings you happiness and love and security. There are many ways you can fill someone’s bucket. You can hug them, or kiss them, give them a compliment or help them. A lovely concept.
Today she gave me lots of hugs, hard hugs and said, “Now your bucket is full”. Then she continued, “Some people like to dip into your bucket. They take your happiness away. They don’t have enough in their buckets so they try to take yours away, but it doesn’t work because their bucket never gets filled up. Bullies have nothing in their buckets”.
It makes you stop and think about whose bucket you are filling and whose bucket you are dipping out of either consciously or not.
I love the way the school counselor made this concept very real for the children. Very real, but in an imaginative way. I also love the fact that Boo wants to fill my bucket up. More than that I love the fact that she has taught me how I can make her happy, make her feel safe, loved, secure.
Boo needs a lot of security. She needs a lot of comfort. She is a whirlwind, a dervish, a flash of red running through the house, but she also is still healing from the tear in the fabric of her family. The safety net.
She didn’t know when she hugged me this morning mid-breakfast, mid-school rush that she had already filled my bucket. We have a ritual in the mornings. I wake her up or she comes into my room. She wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me close to her. She still has the warmth of the night and the aura of sleep around her. Hair escaping the previous night’s braid finding it’s way into my eyes, my face, stinky little morning breath, but she nuzzles and she wraps her legs around and she holds on tight and that overflows my bucket every single day.