a quiet moment, a wild week

 

 

it’s been awhile.

i don’t usually go this long without posting.

so long, my friend debbie emails me to say are you ok?

yes, debbie.  i am okay.

just tired.

again.

hit the wall. 

it’s been three years. you would think by  now i would be getting used to this.

but now the girls are getting older.  it seems they are getting their own ideas and opinions that we need to hash out.  it seems they are getting involved in more and more things.  it seems my time continues to shrink and shrink.  it seems that ten o’clock on Sunday night, still trying to finish up the weekend work comes too quickly and too often these days.  it seems i notice even more the absence of another adult in this house to turn to at any given point.

i’m whining and giving in to self-pity.  it happens on occassion.

but it will be okay.

and i will refocus and come back to take my own advice, enjoy everyday moments.

like right now.  little one is sick, a virus that makes her tired, miserable, rashy, but still cute as a button.  curled up next to me here in bed, with mama, her warm slightly feverish hand pulling mine around her to sleep.  ems is crashed out at the end of my bed convinced it’s unfair that her sister gets to sleep with me and not her.  so here in the midst of all the chaos, the overwhelming scheduling  and rescheduling  lies my peace, my moment.  my two girls with me in bed, fresh flannel sheets and string lullabies playing on the cd player.  it’s a comfort to them and it’s because of this situation that feels not quite so right to me on so many occassions that we have this ability to be three girls curled up comforted in the bed together.  even the oldest of girls here, finally after an insane week, finds a moment of comfort and peace.

it’s wordless wednesday, but i’ve been wordless here for a bit too long.

it’s spring break so there are no lunches to pack, there is no homework to be done for the next four or five days.  thank you for such relief.  this weekend there is much to celebrate.  the arrival of spring, new beginnings, my oldest turning 10 years old and my friend debbie’s wedding.  thank you debbie for taking a moment in all your wedding pre-production to make sure i was okay, and have a beautiful, beautiful day.  relish every moment of your new beginning and then take some time to rest.  from me to you, i am so appreciative that you have found your one.

now it’s up and drag my rear out of bed to start it all over again…….

Advertisements

7 Comments

Filed under single parenthood

7 responses to “a quiet moment, a wild week

  1. Denise

    focus on the positive. easier said than done but it sure helps : )
    p.s. your bed looks so comfy.

  2. I love when my babies are all safe and tucked in…they’re big teenage boys so they won’t climb in bed with me anymore…which is fine. Every once in a while they will come in and and lay nearby and watch a movie with me. I take what I can get these days…

    Life does get busier as they get older…running here and running there. Wait til their friends start driving…and coming to pick them up to go “eat something…or something.” I try to appreciate it all…knowing one day they’ll drive away and that’ll be that.

    Take good care…you are doing a good job…you are an amazing mom. xox

  3. yes, life gets crazier as the kids get older. every stage of life has something to treasure. even now, my 18 and nearly 15 year olds find a way to hang in bed with me. it might only be 5 minutes when they get home at a late hour but they still like snuggling and so do i.
    who’s a good mom? YOU!

  4. Hang in there. Find something small that lifts your heart–a smile, a blossom, a good quote–and hold it in your hand (figuratively or literally).

  5. One foot in front of the other. Baby steps work fine.
    Sometimes we all need a bit of encouragement, and although I don’t really “know” you, I think you’re doing a wonderful job.

    You’re bed looks so comfy-cozy. Yaaaaawwwwnnnn…now I need a nap.

  6. I hope your little one is better soon, and that you manage some rest and recuperation this week. Thank you so much for your good wishes! xxx

  7. Kim

    I’ve been away from your blog for too long and I just wanted to drop in and say that every single time I show up, your words give me comfort, as if I’ve been spun into a cocoon, free to do nothing but dream sweet dreams. This post is tuck-in perfect as I stumble up the stairs to slumber the night away. A good night’s sleep to us all!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s